Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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