David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
