Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
