I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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