I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
