Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
