We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
