I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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