i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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