she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
