I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Pants are for mortals
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
