Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Randomize
