Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
