I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
