Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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