Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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