To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
