it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I hate all girls vehemently.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize