how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
