Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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