So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Randomize
