she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
