Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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