I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
