Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Randomize
