you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
