i was born a porn star she said
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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