It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
