Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize