I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
North Korea, Best Korea!
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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