Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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