There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize