i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i can't believe i had my finger in that
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
