I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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