Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he shaved USA in his pubs
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
