love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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