hotel room ftw
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
