So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
