Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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