I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
