Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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