No stitches, just platelets and will power
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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