Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i dont even know how to be here
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Randomize
