Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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