just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
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