Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize