my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
