i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
