God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
