I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
